Digital Transgender Archive

Interview with Mara Keisling

Mara Keisling, born in 1959 and raised in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, is a white transgender woman assigned male at birth. She started thinking about gender as a toddler. Despite not wanting to be one of the brothers, her father gave her boy haircuts growing up that she didn’t like, and she shared a room with her two brothers. Her sister, on the other hand, had her own room since the rooms were divided by gender. Unable to fully be herself since she was expected to perform as a boy, she preferred being alone and she describes herself as a socially awkward introvert who is always in her own head. Her father worked in public service, working as communications director for the governor and then later working in redevelopment, while her mom was a stay at home mom well into Keisling’s teen years. Hiding the shame of being transgender for decades, Keisling lived with the fear of rejection and violence, but, for the most part, avoided both since she was privileged in some ways, such as being a middle-class white educated person. However, she is a 6’2” tall trans woman, drawing attention to her that “knocked [her] down a couple pegs in the privilege ladder.” To access trans information, such as a list of support groups and conferences along with trans stories, she would buy Tapestry from porn shops. It was a magazine that the International Foundation for Gender Education published. In 1996, Keisling worked up the nerve to attend the Fantasia Fair conference in Provincetown, Massachusetts and then in 1998 she went to the Southern Comfort Conference in Atlanta, Georgia. Attending these trans conferences led to an emotional epiphany to transition in 2009. She received electrolysis to remove her beard. She recounts that trans support groups in the late nineties said that if you came out, “You’re going to lose your job. You’re going to lose your family. You’re going to lose your home. And if you keep any of those, count your blessings.” She did lose a couple of clients and a couple of people in her life but everyone else was amazing. She came out in her late 30s by writing a 27-page document to her parents who were supportive of her transition, her mom even naming her Mara. She is the Executive director of the National Center for Transgender Equality, or NCTE, a trans advocacy organization primarily in Washington, D.C. that works on policy and public education. She talks about the recent election of Trump and his administration as a threat to the trans community and to human rights.